Social Media: New Ways to Fail!
You got on Twitter, but you don’t tweet. You won’t show your face on Facebook, your Pinterest has a bunch of boards without any pins, and forget about Google Plus! There’s absolutely too much to do, and you don’t have enough time to goof around on the Interwebz. Does that sound like you? It actually sounds like a lot of people. There are so many ways to fail, and here are some more in case you haven’t tried these.
Ignore People
When people send you a tweet or tag you on Facebook, don’t respond. Turn off all notifications (what a nuisance!) and pretend not to notice anybody.
Post Once a Month
Post about 2,000 times once a month. Then stop until the same time next month. Calendar it now!
Use Broadcast Mode
Send out your messages continuously, and use UPPER CASE. And lots of punctuation marks!!!!!!!!! People love it when they think you’re yelling!
Don’t Say Anything
Alternately, adopt radio silence. Make like a cricket.
Stalk People
Post embarrassing pictures of your friends on Facebook without asking them and then tag them so that all their friends will see how great they look when they’re drunk and punching a cop in the face. When they ask you about it, laugh. If they ask you to take them down, say “why? you look so good!”
Steal Content
Take other people’s content and pretend it’s yours. When someone politely asks you to stop sharing your content, ignore them.
Be Boring
Make every story sound exactly like the last one. And the next one. And the one after that.
Cross-Post
Use your tweets on Facebook, your Pinterest pins on Instagram, and act hurt when nobody comments on your things.
101 Dalmations
Post only pictures of dogs, nothing else. Or if you’re not into dogs, how about cookie jars? Or old spoons? Everybody finds fire hydrants as fascinating as you do!
Rant
Ranting is a wonderful way to fail
Are you a member of the aluminum foil hat brigade? Let your freak flag fly and rant endlessly about aliens, conspiracies, the government, the other political party, how ObamaCare has failed, and so on. Here are some of the benefits and down sides of ranting.
What New Ways Have You Found to Fail?
Are you as amazed as I am at all the creative ways people find to fail? Let me know about it in the comments!
“Use your tweets on Facebook, your Pinterest pins on Instagram, and act hurt when nobody comments on your things.” <— RIGHT!
Hi Bridget,
People have such unrealistic expectations. They’re always looking for ways to broadcast more and do less actual talking. Then they get hurt because no one shares or comments on their posts. It’s weird!
Thanks,
Carol
Nothing wrong with failure so long as you accept the odds when you commence the activity. I’ll take 99 failures if 1 success delivers what I wanted!
Hi Larry,
Have you had any good failures lately? Gee, it sure seems like there are some creative people out there on the failure front, doesn’t it? Thanks for the comment!
Carol
Hey Eric,
I think ALL CAPS is sorta like the subjunctive in Spanish. People use CAPS because they don’t know when to use upper-case or lower-case, just like people are afraid to use the subjunctive in Spanish (or English, for that matter!). Yeah, they are super annoying! Blech!
Carol
Love, Love, Love this!!
Thanks, Ken! That was a really fun one to write!
Carol
This is so incredibly true for my target market – builders and remodelers. They are constantly looking for the “easy button” with social media and too many of them implement the “let the winter intern do it” approach. #FAIL. I may be sharing this blog post on my blog. If we can eduate a few more folks about the value of being meaningful and authentic online, we’re successful! Thanks, Carol!
Hi again, Tess,
I’ve worked on social media for the trades, so I can relate! A lot of people think that social media is magic, and maybe they think the same about customer service. Like there’s some magic pill they can take that will make all their problems go away. Don’t we wish it were that simple!
Thanks for commenting. I appreciate your taking the time!
Carol
Love this – I don’t get why teaching this is so difficult and why so many don’t “get it”. I also don’t get why people who do posting for others stalk other social people…..shouldn’t they be stalking those who don’t speak????? :) Thank you!
Hello Beth,
I love the comment about “stalking those who don’t speak.” Just because someone is quiet, doesn’t mean they’re not reading posts. Businesses can draw those people out a little by addressing them in tags (especially if they’re okayed before they’re posted). Sometimes people are shy or don’t know what to say.
Thanks for the comment!
Carol
Thank you for his wonderful post. I loved the “Rant” explanation at the end. LOL
Thank you, Patricia! So many people rant on social media! Science has yet to explain why. :D
Carol