This is why I am sick and tired of social media

butterfly photo

Accusations on Facebook

Recently in a closed Facebook group, someone posted a video of someone at a local restaurant hacking something on the ground, which the poster claimed looked like meat. Now, from my angle, and the size of the video, it was pretty difficult to see anything. But that is beside the point. You can imagine what happened once this video hit Facebook. People volunteered to be judge, jury, and executioners.


Someone made the comment that a lot of local cats were disappearing, and insinuated that this restaurant could be the reason why. Once the Pandora’s box of racism was opened, there was no way to get that box closed again. It devolved from there into name-calling, with people making sweeping generalizations about Asians, about Chinese restaurants, about the health department, and so on. A few people tried to defend the restaurant owners, but the majority had already found them guilty without the business owners even realizing they’d been accused of health code violations, disappearing cats, etc.

Snowballing Rants

The person who shot the video was very proud of the number of views, and even thought they might set it to music to make it more popular. More people were pitching in with thoughts about the owners, why they shouldn’t be in business, and more racist remarks about Asians in general.

No Moderators

I kept watching this train wreck of a post, astonished that the moderators let the post remain despite the racism. No one stepped up. In fact, as far as I know, the post is still up.

Lack of Faith in Humanity

Now being on social media is my job. Most days, I’m enthusiastic about the positive changes that can come about because of social media (see my previous post about how social media is changing us for the better). For instance, animal welfare organizations can have petitions go viral quickly. People can find organ donors online. We can meet other people quite easily, extending our networks for collaboration and friendship. But posts like the one I saw really make me wonder why I’m on Facebook, what I’m doing in that particular group, and whether I moved to the right place, since it was in a local neighborhood group

Does This Ever Happen to You?

As an Asian-American and local business owner, there was something so heartbreaking and disturbing about the lack of compassion, jumping to conclusions, and ignorance, that I can’t even put it completely into words. Have you had an experience that made you wonder, too? I’m sure I can’t be the only one! And thank you for reading.




  1. Randy Clark says

    I could say feel your pain my friend, but I can only guess. I no longer jump down the rabbit holes of racism, as well as politics, and religion on SM (I mean SoMe.) I may be naive, but I know it’s there and don’t believe I can change someones point of view on Facebook or The Twitter. I have written about racism and I’m willing to discuss it in person, but I find myself upset, angry, disappointed, and depressed if I begin reading posts and comments about it on social media. So, I avoid opening it, people who spread it, and groups who allow it.

    • Hi Randy,

      In general, I avoid all talk of politics, religion, and anything controversial. I don’t believe I’ll change anyone’s viewpoint, either. However, this is a local board filled with local events, so it’s not as easy to simply leave the board. I can not leave comments or engage with the racists. It is disappointing that in an otherwise positive Facebook group the moderators allow the racism and the tearing down of a small local business to occur. If it continues to happen, I’ll consider leaving the group altogether.

      I’m with you on not being able to change someone’s mind on social media. My friends already know where I stand, as I’m sure yours do, too!

      Thank you for commenting,
      Your friend,

  2. Hi Carol,
    I most definitely understand. We live in a rural environment and I’m in two community (closed) FB groups to follow local activities, fire and weather advisories and more. Every now and then someone posts about loose cattle. We live in a free range area and cattle are required to be in specific areas, however hunters, non locals and locals often leave gates open or there are holes in fences. Laws require area landowners to fence their own property if they don’t want loose cattle in there. If someone complains about loose cattle the FB post immediately turns ugly. I just have to stay off that post because it really taints my view of some of my neighbors.
    SoMe definitely has highlights and lowlights.

    • Hi Patricia,
      Wow! When I wrote this post I definitely didn’t think I’d hear about loose cattle! Yes, taint is exactly the right word. I’m not sure why people don’t filter their own thoughts a little more. We don’t have to put everything out there, especially when it doesn’t paint us in a good light, right? I mean, do people WANT to seem racist or narrow-minded? Maybe some of them do. It does make you wonder.

      Thanks for stopping by!

  3. Oh Carol. I saw that post with the video too and I couldn’t see a thing that was being chopped.
    I was too chickensh*t to speak up about it by commenting.
    Now I wish I did. I am so, so sorry I didn’t make a comment.

    I haven’t read all the comments yet –I don’t know if it’s still up, but I’m about to go see if it is. If the post is still there, I’m complaining to Tara Brown.

    My first impression was that the “person” who posted it was creating slander & I felt the post was wildly inappropriate for the group.

    What the hell are the moderators doing being moderators if they can’t do the job?

    Then I got distracted.

    How I wish I spoke up.

    I’ll write again here. Off to check the group now….

    • Hi Dyane,
      Yes, I was surprised that whoever posted the video did it without a second thought! I wonder how they would feel if someone took a video of them doing something and then condemning them without giving them the benefit of the doubt? Probably they wouldn’t be happy. But I think it’s on the moderator/moderators to remind people about the rules. Slander and racism don’t belong in neighbor groups, in my opinion.

      Thank you for reading. I’m glad you did.

      See you soon! (One way or the other.)

  4. Dyane Harwood says

    It looks like the post was removed!!!!! I hope I’m right!

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