Greatest ways to do time in Facebook jail.
Now you’ve done it! You’ve landed yourself in Facebook jail! You know that there’s no easy way to get out, right? And you’ll never even know what you actually did to land yourself there. Like Instagram, Facebook is often a mystery. People’s accounts get deleted or they can’t post for a certain amount of time–and often they don’t even know why.
Tally up the Days You Have Left
Tally up the Days You Have Left
If you only have three days to spend in jail, then maybe use hours instead because that’s more impressive. Use a piece of chalk and hatch marks.
Have Your Best Friend Tell Everyone What Happened
Have Your Best Friend Tell Everyone What Happened
After all, you don’t want all your friends and fans to be guessing what happened! They need to know that you planned to do this so you could write about it later!
Photo by Sole Treadmill 
Work out Like the Wild Internet Marketing Thang You Are
Here’s an excuse to finally make use of that Fitbit you got last Christmas! Oh, wait. You don’t get to keep a Fitbit in jail. But you can still do pushups!
Encourage People to Bake You Cakes with Files in Them
It’s not old-school, it’s retro! Your friends can find a good recipe on Pinterest, no doubt! What? They’re not on Pinterest yet? Here are a couple of ways for them to get started!
Be Proud
Like some of the most seasoned criminals, feel proud that you were in jail! Show off the nifty haircut you got while you were there. Talk about all the interesting people you met, and some of their stories. And tell them about the — gulp! — showers!
Get Tattooed
Bet you didn’t know you could get tattooed while you were in Facebook jail, did you? You can and you should!
Catch up on Old Movies
You might not have cable or Netflix in Facebook jail, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have rabbit ears! Remember those?
Get Some Sleep
You were getting up early and staying up late because of your Facebook posting schedule, weren’t you? Now you can stay in bed a little longer.
Photo by Abel Cheung
Play Chess
If you don’t know how to play, someone will surely be happy to teach you!
Start Digging
Remember the Shawshank Redemption, Stephen King’s novel that was made into a movie? If not, put it on your list to watch as soon as you get out of jail!
Photo by Noodles and Beef
Guess Who Squealed on You
Was it the guy whose meme you stole? Maybe.
How’d You Spend Your Time in Facebook Jail?
Let me know in the comments! If you’re still in jail, let me know later!
Oh my God, this is hilarious!!!!!! Love the pictures and the creative captions – this one begs for a rewteet, Lady Carol! Gotta go find it in ye olde Twitterland!
Thank you, Dyane! A friend of mine was in Facebook jail, and inspired me to write this! I’ve only ever been in Twitter jail. :D
This is hysterical!! Of course, I had to google “What is Facebook jail?” first to truly appreciate it!!
Thanks, Sandy! I’m very glad you had fun reading it–because I had fun writing it!
Sincerely,
Carol
If you are a supporter of President Donald J Trump and publish your Conservative views. Zuch’s company picks up on certain phrases and then they shadow your every post. In no time, anything you say, that goes against Islam, Sharia Law or obama, lands you in Facebook jail.
It starts with a warning, then a 24 hour ban, then a 72 hour ban, then a 30 day ban. The way to deal with Facebook jail, is to get one or more new e-mail addresses. Use different versions of your name:
1- first/last name
2- first/m.i./last name
3- middle/last name
4- legitimate nickname and last name
5- first and mothers maiden name
There are several ways to get around “Facebook Jail,” I know as I have 5 different accounts.
Hello Bernard,
That’s interesting. However, I wouldn’t advise using different versions of your name as that can get you banned as well. People who have lots of friends and connections on Facebook could lose everything they’ve worked so hard for.
Thank you for stopping by,
Carol